Relationships (in general =P) i think being back home has brought me to the realization that... i am not good at keeping long distance relationships... i dunno what it is with me... no willpower? no dedication? laziness? who knows.... it's unfortunate i know...
wherever i'm at, i have frenz there... ie. waterloo, rhill... but when i'm at one place, my friendships which God has greatly blessed me with tend to slowly fade away or become weaker... i guess it's natural, or that could just be one of the excuses i make for myself. it feels like a trade-off, like i can't have good relationships with everyone at the same time... what is God teaching me?
Building relationships take a lot of time, effort, and prayer.... so why is it now that i am back home...it seems that part of the passion for my waterloo buds is lost? i no longer take the time to msn/email/call them as i should... i no longer pray for all of their needs on a regular basis as i should... (NO EXCUSE) ... i no longer pray regularly for CCF and all of its various ministries... (NO EXCUSE)... i guess it's hard for me to pray for things/ppl when i don't get to be updated on their progress and when i don't know their new prayer requests... i guess it comes in part with keepin in touch w/ ppl... i've gotta learn that it doesn't matter so much about ppl's updates, but more that i continue to persevere and pray for my fellow bros and sis's in Christ and especially for my non-Christian frenz...
on the other hand, it's been awesome to be back home, despite the lack of independence... me and my sister's relationship is picking up rite where it left off when i left in september for waterloo... that's not to say there arent' any fights, squabbles, and annoyances, there are... and i know that there are things that my parents aren't pleased about with me, but i find myself so much more dedicated to home now... it's also been great to get to know new ppl at work...
so what will God do to change my heart? i dunno... but what i do know is that i've gotta be 100% willing for Him to change it and embrace the change.. pray for me guyz~~